Do you know those movie dream sequences where two lovers joyfully run from opposite ends of a grassy field into each others arms? Well, our marriage has never had a moment like that. Pat has never rode a white horse and rescued me. He has never drawn a saber and clashed his way across a room full of villains, climbed the highest tower of a magical castle, or slain a fire breathing dragon. Most fairytales end with “and they lived happily ever after.” And that is the point - they lived after the wedding.
Pat has lived with me at my best and worst, which is considerable, for 34 wonderful years. I need his love and counsel. His support and discernment. His presence and willingness to jump in wholeheartedly with whatever scheme I’ve come up with. Have three children, then three more. Change diapers, load car seats, build swing sets and swimming pools, put up tents, chaperone field trips, go to summer camp, and watch ball games. He’s gone out in the middle of the night to get medicine, ice cream, and pepto bismal.
The villains he has fought are not found in fairytales. He has unplugged toilets - the yucky ones. He has killed spiders and trapped snakes and bats while I have cowered in the corner or stood on a chair yelling frantic instructions. Pat has put together cribs, cabinets, beds, bicycles, and chicken coops. He has been vomited on, cried on, and worn baby spit on his shoulders.
Pat has never ridden a white horse, but He has rescued me. He found me when my car was stuck on a highway and battled traffic to get to the scene of my accident because I said that I was uninjured, but scared. Pat has brought me my glasses and lunch at school when I have forgotten them on the table on my way out the door.
He has endured chick flicks. He has done the lighting and sound for school plays for 500 students. Not one of them were his.
And when the dragon called cancer came to call. Pat held me and comforted me and took me for second opinions. He kept track of medications after surgery and let me nap when I felt like it. He bought me a $25.00 sandwich on a hot dog bun after a stressful day at Sloan Kettering.
He gives me technical support for my computer woes. He tells me repeatedly about stocks and target lines until my eyes glaze over, in the hopes that one day I’ll understand. He makes me laugh.
We’ve been in planes, trains, and automobiles. On his mail route, I sat in the drivers seat while Pat drove the car from the passenger seat. He has taken me on endless road trips where he has been afraid to stop for fear that I wouldn’t get back in the car. I do not travel well. Each week, he makes sure my gas tank is full.
And then there are boats. My land lubber husband has braved fishing and sailing in the ocean, and even kayaking on the Wappinger’s Creek at flood stage. We lost a camera, prescription eyeglasses, sneakers, and a sweatshirt on that trip.
Pat knows my faults and forgives them -often.
Pat stands by my side in church, at home, and in life.
Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away. if one were to give all the wealth of his house for love, it would be utterly scorned. ~ Song of Solomon 8:7I am a grateful wife.